I want to genuinely apologize for some overly critical articles and social media postings I wrote from 2017 to 2020, about Bapdada, Brahma Kumaris family, Didi Dr. Nirmala, Sister Jayanti, Sister Shivani, BK Jothi, Sister Maureen (BK Morni), and my eldest brother Tom.

I have since removed all my past BK articles and videos on 7th March 2021, to show my goodwill and my change of heart towards BKs.

I will refrain from too harsh negative postings of such nature in the future.

This is indeed coming from my true deep remorse, I take full ownership, I choose to rise above, to make amends. If I had hurt anyone’s feelings, I hope you can accept my sincere apologies.

Part of my healing and being at peace with Brahma Kumaris is writing this BK Memoirs ebook.


It was no coincidence that I ended up making two apology notices within a few days from each other.

The first apology notice is regarding some alleged defamatory articles and social media postings which the “old Robert” wrote in 2019 and 2020.

NOTE: A higher consciousness apology notice is very different from the normal apology notice in many ways such as it is written from the heart in higher consciousness, with full respect for all parties. A normal apology notice is usually written or edited by lawyers with a few rounds of approval from all parties, whereas a higher consciousness apology notice goes to heart of the matter, and accept every soul has roles to play and is part of the God-Universe as in the quote below:

“Let’s accept that EVERY soul, every sentient being, every non-living thing, including Covid-19, Hitler, Mother Teresa, and every BK has roles to play, and everything is part of the God-Universe.” ~ Robren

When Jothi called me to verify some facts about Malaysian’s first ever BK pubic program, in time for his creating a video testimonial for Dadi Janki’s first memorial, I first apologized to Jothi for yelling at him during the Silver 25th Anniversary of Brahma Kumaris Malaysia. I have no excuses, absolutely no BS excuses.

Jothi is the first BK brother and teacher in Malaysia. He later succeeded Tom as the second local head of BK Malaysian service. Yes, Jothi was initially the “reluctant leader”, having the role shoved onto him with the sudden departure of Tom to Hong Kong. That “betrayal” story was covered in Chapter 2. I was one of three involved, which I deeply regretted, one of them, Tony, is dead.

My experience of Jothi is… he is humble, underrated, he may not have the natural charisma of some BK leaders but he is the voice of conscience for injustice within the Malaysian BK family. He stayed with BK for the last 39 years, mainly in Johor Bahru, so that tells you something, doesn’t it? He is not into power politics, name and fame as Baba calls it, and he has a high level of gratitude and contentment.

What I think will take Jothi to the next level is… conviction of the heart, know your worth as the “first original jewels” of the BK Malaysian family. You are the voice of conscience to unite the Malaysian BK family. If the seniors let me, I have the skills to be the glue to help heal and unite the Malaysian BK family.

My apology to Jothi is… for yelling at him during the 25th anniversary of BK Malaysia, and for silently resenting him for succeeding Tom as the second local BK head of Malaysia.
Please forgive me.

Jothi, you are a very good soul, you have a good heart, never forget who helped you in your life.

Jothi felt my ending of my recent hostility with BKs since 2017, and now having totally transformed to Robren on 21st February 2021, and my being open is the key to healing the Malaysian BK family. After all Tom and I were the “original jewels” of Malaysian BK service. Who could be better and more neutral and objective than the world’s first Chinese BK leaders to help heal the Malaysian BK family?

I will offer Jothi to “give back to the BK family”, for free. I will ask how I can assist to unite the Malaysian BK family, maybe through my professional change expertise and “The 10 Qualities of Diamond Leadership” training.

My late wife Brenda and I helped to transform and co-coach Fortune 500 corporations such Coca-Cola China, Hong Kong Airport Services, Swire, Jardines, and Hutchison Whampoa, Auditor General Office of Maldives, and over 300 CEOs in Malaysia’s Silicon Valley in CyberJaya.

I sense some BKs will be suspicious of my intentions mainly because of my high profile hostility, but I have let go of my 6 Ego Identifiers, which include these 3 false egos is “I am what I have, what I do, and what other people think of me.”

My experience reveals that the staff tends to be more open to external trainers and consultants, as they tend to be more suspicious of their own internal trainers and their possible hidden agenda. In fact it will be much more effective if I am not part or a BK member of the BK system. That way I am not conditioned by the BK family system.

I can clearly declare that I personally have no hidden agenda, no fear or favour to any BK. Time has healed my heart with BKs since I left BKs in 1989, and thirty two years has been a long time to heal my heart with BKs.

In my “Make Amends and Incomplete List” to do before I die is to make apologies to some people who matters a lot to me, even though it appears to be opposite, that I don’t care and have been ignoring and outwardly rejecting some BKs.

One such BK is my ex-Sister-in-Law, Sister Maureen Chen or BK Morni. In the last few years I deliberately avoided her whenever our paths crossed when she visited my brother Andrew and my Mum in Hong Kong. I apologize to Maureen for any hurt I had caused.

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A rare photo of BK Maureen, Brenda Jose, and Robert Chaen at United Nations Day 1995 at Victoria Park, Hong Kong.

My experience of Maureen is… she is the “Rock of Gibraltar” in the Double Foreigner BK service, she is excellent with VIPs and publicity. She is fiercely loyal, dedicated and unwavering in faith. She was my confidante wherever she visited Tom and I in Kuala Lumpur or when we met in Madhuban BK headquarters, but Tom discouraged me from sharing with Maureen. I think he was scared I would bad mouth him.

It was Maureen who showed up for me after I willingly made a public statement of my downfall in front BKs after the Murli in Madhuban. That story later. She invited me to Hong Kong in 1987, and said would fit in very well with the Western BKs. I remember I didn’t even know how to type, and she got me to do typing lessons after class. I became her confidante sharing about problematic strong BK characters in Hong Kong.

What I think will take Maureen to the next level is… I know you love Asia and you have done many years of service in Asia, the key is to get some local BK allies who support your leadership like the Dadi Chandramani story I shared in chapter 2. You are not bossy, however you need to stand up with your conviction of the heart. Know the ways of politics and still live in higher consciousness.

My apology to Maureen is… for withholding my love and rejecting our friendship in recent years
Please forgive me.

Maureen, you are a very good ex-Sister-In-Law, and a loving confidante. You care enough to visit my Mum and my brothers, when others choose to forget what Tom and I have contributed to BKs. Or they are just too scared to talk me.

I salute you. I have the highest respects for you, Maureen. You deserved a much higher role in BK.


Why is it called “Double Foreigner”?

Because according to Shiva Baba, the Supreme Soul and the God of BKs, firstly, souls are foreign to Earth, they come from the “Soul World” to a play a role, with a maximum of 84 lifetimes if you are born in the first generation of Golden Age or Sat Yuga, around 5,000 years ago.

Secondly, non-Indians are foreigners to Bharat or ancient India where Shiva Baba’s Golden Age was supposed to be, 5,000 years ago.

Maureen and my eldest brother Tom were the world’s second Double Foreigner couples. The first Double Foreigner couple is another Maureen from UK. Maureen and Tom were considered “the Original Double Foreigner Jewels”. They took gyan or BK knowledge around 1977.

How I was introduced to BK

Tom introduced me to BK on around September 1979. Tom drove from Sydney to Melbourne and shared the 5 day BK course in 2 hours. I had a wonderful experience in my first open-eyed meditation with Tom. I saw his aura. He then drove me to the first Melbourne Raja Yoga centre in Fitzroy. He introduced Brother Charlie Hogg. In my early BK days, Brother Charlie would invite me to stay at the centre, slept in a sleeping bag in one of rooms. I distinctively remembered the outside chime that sounded during the night. It was very peaceful and serene in Australian Raja Yoga centres.

One time at the Melbourne centre, I remembered I offered to cook my first vegetarian meal. I could tell it was way too spicy for Brother Charlie. Initially I found the Australian BK dishes to be too bland and boring for my taste. I decided to improve my vegetarian cooking skills.

In the coming years, my vegetarian cooking became the best kept secret among the Dadis, the most senior original sisters who started BK with Brahma Baba or Dada Lekhraj, the founder of BK, and the first chariot of Shiva Baba. I would take ingredients to Madhuban, the headquarters of BK in Mt. Abu, Rajasthan, India. I would cook for the late Administrative Head, Dadi Prakash Mani, the late Dadi Janki and other Dadis. Their favorite dish was my sweet and sour sauce and deep-fried cauliflower in batter.

Ok, I digressed. Actually I will digress a lot as I have so much wonderful ‘juicy’ experiences to share.
Now back to Tom.


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Robert (right) and his eldest brother, Tom (left)

My experience of Tom is… he is highly charismatic, he touch people with his guitar, his singing, and his inspirational speech, however he was much misunderstood by his non-action, and incoherent thoughts, actions, and behavior.

What I think will take Tom to the next level is… to walk the talk, be a good role model, let go of the ego of what people think of you and you’ll shine. Don’t isolate yourself, disclose what is going on inside your heart, and mind, with someone you trust. You go visit a confidante but you only share your heart in the last 10 minutes. Have courage. Talk to your soulmate, Maureen. When you let go of your judgments of others and you let go of your own insecurity and fear of being judged. By talking you solve many problems, you are not alone in your struggles. You are a “mirror” of my own weaknesses, and vice versa.

Let go the 6 Ego Identifiers especially “Letting go of who I am is what other people think of me”. Let go of being overly sensitive, too thin-skinned. Change your limiting beliefs about money, work, and business. Have staying power, don’t give up too easily.

My apology to Tom is… I have made my apologies already though the years. Accept me for who I am, as I accept you for who you are.
I forgive him to being too tough on me in my early BK years.

Tom, you are a very good eldest brother. I now treasure you and what you had done for me in the past. I know you care too much for me. Let’s talk more with our brothers like the old times when we were kids.

And now, after avoiding this for many years, this is what I want to say to Didi Dr. Nirmala.

My experience of Didi Dr. Nirmala is… she is very objective, she see through below the root to solve the problem, she is fearless, a clear instrument of God. She play the bad cop, when some Senior Dadis play the good cop. Playing the bad cop is not an easy role, but a very important role. She rather have respect from others than be popular – I salute her for that

I debated whether my feedback to Didi should be made privately. Then I am reminded that we are all equal. No one is above the rule of law, or above the rule of constructive feedback.

What I think will take Didi to the next level is… truth hurts, telling the truth is an art, it’s not a science, or a medical procedure, learn more effective modern leadership skills, positive encouragement and constructive feedback, is more effective than negative confrontation, guide people to make their own decision than give one way Shrimat (higher directions) and advice. That way people will take better ownership, than be puppets.

My apology to you is… for fighting with her, for bad mouthing her, for judging her, for being a rebel, for the bad blood between us over the years.
Please forgive me.

I forgive you for choosing Jothi over me to succeed Tom. You were like an Empress who stepped on me to control me. But, now I am free. Didi, you are my greatest teacher in BK, beside Bapdada. Because your playing the tough love role have strengthen me. I now appreciate or treasure it.

Didi Dr. Nirmala, you are a very strong leader. You did what you need to lead and keep the vast BK family together. Didi, you have my highest respects.

Since I’ve come so far, here’s what Robren TwinSouls want say to our fellow Twin Souls of Shiva Baba and Brahma Baba, Bapdada, the Supreme Soul and God of BKs.

Our experience of Bapdada is… They (remember there are 2 of them – Twins) have a supreme role to teach non-attachment and non-5 vices living. I have come to understand the role of Twin Souls deeper by studying their Bapdada Twin Souls activities since I became Robren, the combined presence of Twin Souls, Whisperer Robert and Angel Brenda. I am still discovering the roles of a Twin Soul. Your Avyakt Bapdada private meeting messages to numerous BK children per night is amazing. This is what I treasure the most about you. Your children remember your words in times of trouble, and for many years.

What we think will take Bapdada and the BK family to the next level is… return to your original role, let go of beliefs that no longer serve your BK children, let the youth junior BKs make Brahma Kumaris relevant to today’s world, senior BKs don’t make promises you can’t keep, don’t be so extreme in maintaining BK discipline, love conquers all including Dharamraj, drop the end of the world doomsday scare, there are more effective ways to make the world a better place.

Robren’s one hope has always been that Brahma Kumaris maintain a relationship with their own physical family, relatives, and old friends, instead of isolating themselves, and only have connections with the BK family. Have a ‘bridge’, an ongoing dialogue, communication, and forum between BKs, Ex-BKs, and their families and friends. We are excellent facilitators, we can help you in this.

Heal and unite the BK family, which includes ex-BKs.

Robert remembers how the late Dadi Prakash Mani aka Dadi Komarka once asked to invite ex-BKs to dialogue why they left Baba and the Yagya (institution). Instead of ostracizing ex-BKs, get their blessings, have gratitude for what ex-BKs have contributed to the Yagya. This is the main reason why Robren is writing this BK Memoirs.

Robert’s apology to Bapdada is… for the series of articles and videos criticizing their beliefs. It was disrespectful for me to judge and not accept them and BKs as part of the God-Universe.

Brahma Baba, you are a very insightful, generous, totally surrendered religious founder chariot. You have conquered lust excellently, now conquer the last temptation of attachment and pride of letting go your BK children. Let your mithaee, mithaee, sweet, sweet BK children take over. Mama is waiting for you.
Shiva Baba, you are a very supremely enlightened, religious founder soul. Your current chariot is getting very old. It’s time to return to your Soul World after 85 years, and take other souls with you, and return again with a higher consciousness purpose.

By the way, this constructive feedback process is what my late wife Brenda and I are famous for in my Diamond Leadership masterclass and Papillion-Butterfly Life-Changing MasterClass.

I will continue to share my personal experience stories with the remaining Senior BK leaders mentioned above in later chapters, as it will make this chapter too long.

Therefore, I would like to find closure and apologize to Sister Jayanti, Sister Meera, and Sister Shivani for any hurtful comments I made in my articles and videos, and also for challenging some senior BKs to a public debate on BK beliefs and practices. Please forgive me.

Wow! This third chapter is super intense!
I didn’t expect how it flowed like it did, when I first started to write this chapter.
Om Shanti. I am at peace with Brahma Kumaris in general, and send my highest respects to those whom I did BK service closely with, gratitude and many thanks, there are way too many to name, you know who you are.


I made a Soul to Soul Apology and Robren gave Feedback Praise a night before Bapdada left the corporeal world for good.

I completed Chapter 3 on the night before the death of Dadi Gulzar, I telepathically whispered to Bapdada the key points of Chapter 3, which are asking for forgiveness from Bapdada, and my apology notice, with a feedback praise. I did my completion ritual with Bapdada the night  before Bapdada and Dadi Gulzar left us for the Soul World.

It was very ironic that I gave feedback to Bapdada about their current chariot is getting very old. It’s time to return to their Soul World after 85 years, and take other souls with them, and return again with a higher consciousness purpose. This was psychic premonition that Bapdada will leave us soon – and it happened the next day.