How Dare You Question My Integrity!

How Dare You Question My Integrity!

Imagine sifting through a stack of mail only to find an official memo informing you that you are now the subject of investigation for an offense you did not commit. Or, perhaps, the notification comes via a visit or phone call. Regardless of how the news is delivered, learning that you are a person of concern can feel like a sock in the gut. Being inaccurately or unfairly accused of something awful or even just slightly irregular can be terrifying and hurtful. It’s completely normal to worry about your reputation and be nervous about whether you will be treated fairly.

There are some things you can do to get through the process without unnecessary drama. The first is to remain calm and relatively quiet. Loud claims of innocence and noisy pronouncements about your plans to sue for defamation of character are rarely helpful. You may be tempted to proclaim, “How dare this institution charge me with [insert allegation here] after all of my contributions and years of institutional loyalty!”

Be sure to utter these words only in your mind, as protesting too much can actually raise concerns.

If you have done nothing wrong, it is generally best to treat the complaint as yet another annoying item on your to-do list and do your best to muddle through the process, working to be as cooperative as possible.

In my experience, the folks who tend to fare best are those who express surprise and disappointment that their integrity has been challenged. They don’t get indignant and they don’t make it unnecessarily difficult for investigators to uncover the facts. Importantly, they don’t get mad at investigators for doing their jobs. These people ask intelligent questions about how the investigation process will unfold and respond to questions and data requests in a timely manner. Also, rather than assuming that the truth will eventually be revealed, they proactively share information that might influence the investigation (e.g., “Did he mention that he was angry with me for assigning a Thursday night course?” or “It’s true that I frequently kissed her on the mouth in front of others, but we were in a serious relationship at the time”). In the event they believe the investigation is being poorly managed, those under investigation raise these concerns with the investigators before writing a letter of condemnation to the president.

Have you ever been unfairly accused of a serious offense? Do you have any advice for friends or colleagues who might find themselves in a similar situation?

April 2, 2012 by

Read comments…

Published by

Robert Chaen

Global CEO-Founder of ChangeU and Movsha Movers & Shakers, Hero-CEO Whisperer, Writer, The #1 Alpha Change Expert, Father of Asian FireWalking Robert Chaen is an International Keynote Speaker, writer, researcher, and corp games designer. He is famously known to be the “Hero-CEO Whisperer”, 1-on1 coaching with many CEOs and Celebrities for corporate strategies, staff & office political issues, personal branding, and even public figure OSHA safety drilling called Drager Defense. He has transformed CEOs and managers in Coca-Cola China, TVB Hong Kong, Cathay Pacific, Hong Kong Airport Services, VADS, TM, Public Bank, Auditor General's Office Maldives, etc. He is the prolific creator and online Author of innovative management tools such as DragonCEO, Diamond Leader, Papillon Personal Effectiveness, OSHA Drager Defense, KPI Bank, etc. He is also the Founder of Movsha, an international networking with monthly mingles with MOVers & SHAkers, Angels, Entrepreneurs, CEOs, Celebrities, HR-PR-CSR, HODs, and the Most Influential IDEA people. ​Chaen is widely considered as one of the top International Platform Keynote Speakers for Resorts World Genting Senior Management Conference (Manila), 7-Eleven HK, Samsung, Coca-Cola China Mini-MBA @Tsing Hua University, Cathay Pacific, Hong Kong Jockey Club, The Story Conference where he interviewed Datuk Kamarudin (Chairman of AirAsia) and Siti Nurhaliza. He has been widely featured in TVB, AWSJ, CNBC, SCMP, The Star, and Sin Chew. As “The Father of Asian FireWalking”, he coached TVB celebrities (Ekin Cheng Yee-Kin) to walk on 650°C fire; and raised HK$68M in the world’s 1st and only live TV Charity FireWalk (TVB Tung Wah Charity Show), before Tony Robbins even came to Asia. If Robert can get you to walk on 650⁰C fire, he can inspire you to be THE BEST. He champions CN-HK-EU-US Tycoons to be philanthropic, and to be angel investors to support the next generation of Jack Mas, Steve Jobs, Richard Bransons, Steven Spielbergs, or Barrack Obamas. With some slick motivational speakers with fake doctorates out there, graduates often describe Robert to be "the most credible, empowering, truthful Coach" who believe in his graduates to believe in themselves. ​However, clients have described Robert as "The #1 Cool Badass Alpha Change Expert". He has the coolest first class stature, rapport and trust from clients. He will not hesitate to tell the badass truth ever so gently because clients are paying him big bucks to reveal the truth, find solutions, persuade the hostile HODs, and align cross-teams within the organization. Originally based in Hong Kong for 20+ years, he had worked with top Branding/Ad agencies at J Walter Thompson and Leo Burnett, and was a certified FranklinCovey (7 Habits) in USA, and NLP MasterCoach (USA). His warmth is known to soften the most hardened, resistant sceptics. He will inspire your team to Go for Top 1, or to be a Dragon CEO. With boundless energies, Robert owns 15+ successful business Joint-Ventures, and created unique products under his global VC network called Chaen's Angels VC. He is deeply passionate about ChangeUTH Youth CSR, Science-Based Medicine (vs. quackery), short films and Reality TV. Touched by a personal tragedy through the loss of his HK-born Portuguese wife, co-coach and business partner, Brenda José of 18 years, Robert explores the many ways in which the spirit world is communicating with the living with real scientific studies and evidence. He gives inspiring conferences on The Secret Afterlife.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s